Small Victories

Hyperemesis means that "success" is redefined.  

Before my first pregnancy, I assumed that "success" in early pregnancy meant making it through work, not killing your husband, and getting a nap every once in awhile.  

Thanks to HG, success currently looks like....

~Keeping my ketones down!  Yay!  I am no longer digesting myself!

~Keeping my weight stable

~Keeping down more than 32 ounces of liquid a day (the point at which I have to go back on home IVs)

~Successfully changing my infusion site daily

~Keeping down bland, carb-laden food

~Pooping.  Thanks, Zofran constipation!

~Possibly making it through a few days of work

So keep me in your prayers as I go back to work tomorrow!

Zofran pump: Yes, I get to stick needles in myself...

I got all set up with home healthcare yesterday.  This means a nurse comes to my house and gives me IVs as needed, and taught me to use my Zofran Pump.

The first two bags of IV fluids went well.  The third wouldn't go through, and it turned out my arm had clotted off the IV.  So a nurse came BACK again today to try to re-start it.  After trying in 3 different areas, all with no luck (and lots of bruises), I told her just to give up.  The poking around was actually making me more nauseous.  I'm keeping liquids down, so maybe I can stay hydrated enough.  Hopefully.  If not, maybe my veins will be better tomorrow.  Sigh.  And now the doctors office is mad at me for "refusing treatment", and I get to go in and be lectured tomorrow.

Aside from that, the pump is great!  I've been keeping everything down (and by everything, I mean lemonade, lime sherbet, and frozen waffles).  I even changed out the injection site myself, so I'm pretty proud.  I have a serious needle phobia, so the ability to stick myself is a big deal!

I have to go into work for a few hours tomorrow....wish me luck.

That time I got a pity ultrasound...

Today, I got a pity ultrasound.

After a morning of taking tiny sips of water, and immediately throwing them up, all while entertaining a toddler from the floor of the bathroom, I had my follow up with my OB.  And was promptly sent back to the ER for more fluids.

Before I left, however, she looked at me with pity in her eyes and said those glorious words:  "I feel like if you're here this frequently, we should at least get a peek at the baby!"

I've never been so happy in my life to see the jumbo probe covers that accompany a 1st trimester ultrasound.  And there was my little bean!  Heartbeat of 120, bouncing around happily!  I'll post a picture tomorrow so we can do the whole Ramzi thing.  Other weird stuff:  this baby also came from my right ovary, just like Levi!

Then it was on to the ER...where the nurses recognized me, apologized for the giant bruise on my left arm, and promised to be kinder this time.

Another Alleluia: I am approved for home health care!  They're sending people to my house to give me IVs and a Zofran pump!  Hopefully this means I'll be back to (limited) work next week. She said I wouldn't be 100% (not that I expect that), but I should be 50% better than where I am.  A miracle, if you ask me.

My biggest fear now: sticking needles in myself.  No longer do I need a Xanax to get a shot, but I still do not LIKE needles, let alone sticking them into myself.  So pray for me for that!

It's Baaaa-aack... (The Hyperemesis, that is)

Today I announced to the world that I'm 6 weeks pregnant.

Those close to me all asked the same follow up question:  "How are you feeling?!"

For me, this question is far more loaded, and contains far more subtext...beyond queasiness, beyond tiredness, beyond the growing pains of pregnancy.  This question means "is your hyperemesis back!?"

The short answer: yes.

The long answer: yes, but managed far, far better than last time.

I went into this pregnancy on a special diet (high protein, extra vitamin b6), extra medical treatment (chiropractic care, pre-conception doctors meetings), and a wing and a prayer.  With my Levi-pregnancy, I started feeling sick at 4.5 weeks.  So early that I thought it was all in my head.  This time, I made it a whole extra week.

This puts us at Tuesday the 15th.  Actually, the nausea started Monday the 14th, but I chalked it up to the fact that I got stuck at work longer than anticipated, and was STARVING when I got home.  Then, Tuesday morning, I woke up feeling awful.  The few sips of gatorade I managed came right back up.  Things were smelling weird, and I was grossed out by even my favorite foods.  Luckily, it took a quick phone call to the doctor, a hurried visit (2-year-old in tow), and a Zofran prescription to at least get me to the point where I was keeping water down.  Whew, right?

Well, Wednesday I stumbled through work, kept a few things down, and fell into bed.  Thursday was worse...it was Levi's birthday, and there I was, dry heaving in the parking lot of Choo Choo Johnny's.

Sidenote:  My toddler thinks this is hilarious.  He stands in the doorway and giggles when I vomit.  He makes gagging sounds when I do.  When I was in the ER Friday, he pressed the "Y for Yak" button repeatedly as I was checking in.  He's a peach, really.  It really made his birthday special that he had a "meal on train wheels" AND a barfing Mommy.

Friday morning, I woke up and felt like I was having a panic attack.  Realized that my heartbeat was super fast (heartrate in bed: over 100), and called the doc back...and was promptly sent to the ER.  Last time I had HG (My HG story), I fought tooth and nail to avoid the ER.  I have a HUGE needle phobia, hate anything medical, and worry about the cost.  But, in a clear, non-HG moment, I promised myself that I would get fluids if needed this time.

Let me tell you, it was the best.  After the first bag, I was still panicky, heart rate was crazy, and my blood pressure was like 100/52.  The doctor had the "there's a crying pregnant woman" look in his eyes, and I was promptly hooked up to bag #2.  At this point, Little Guy went home to sleep, and I got fluids, more IV Zofran, and Anderson Cooper, uninterrupted.  Heaven.  I felt a million times better.

Today I've been fine on the Zofran, kept food down (melons and mashed potatoes), and had enough energy to throw my little man a birthday party.  We also told all the relatives and friends with this shirt:

He wouldn't hold still long enough to get a picture!

So I will keep the internet-world updated.  Hopefully my life won't involve any more IVs (or punctured veins...I currently look like a heroin addict), and hopefully this little person will be nicer to me than Levi was!